Assisi

Several friends of ours asked us, “What about Assisi — tell us what happened there for you?”  

When we arrived in Rome, Italy we took a 3 hour train ride north east to Assisi.  We were to stay in a monastery there.  Once we were shown to our rooms and I sat on the bed, a deep stillness came over me — I didn’t want to move.  Steve was feeling the same thing and we both agreed to remain here in Assisi for the entire week and not go anywhere else.  We felt, we can just get back on the train that takes us back to the airport in Rome and fly home from there.  Easy — and this sacred village captivated us.

Each day we went to a different sacred place.  The first place was the St. Francis Basilica and we went immediately to his tomb. The rest of the Basilica was to glitzy and was not St. Francis to us.  The next day we went to St. Clare Basilica where she was entombed.  It was lovely.  But, the best place we found, where the simplicity reflects these two saintly beings more clearly, was at San Damiano.  

It was down the hill outside of the walls of Assisi.  Here is where St. Francis got the message from the crucifix of Jesus, “rebuild my church”  which he then proceeded to do.   It was also where St. Clare lived her entire life.  Here we could relax and receive the gift of their Holy Presence.

Yes, we found great places to eat awesome food and overdid it on gelato — but, more importantly we had the time in a sacred place to integrate our experience from the time in Africa.  By the end of the week, ideas were coming as to how to continue being neighbors with our African friends.  

Now that we are home, it is apparent that it is going to take some time to integrate our personal experiences from Africa.  I noticed that everything was the same at home, but something was very different in us.  In Africa, we were open to what was presented in the moment and gave completely over to it.  So, in the same way, we are continuing this process.  We shall see where this takes us.

(From my journal)  On my first day in Assisi I had a beautiful walk in the woods where Francis walked and sat in a simple, quiet chapel.  Yesterday, I succumbed twice to the pervasive offerings of sweets in this tourist town.

On my fourth day here I finally experienced something deep.  As I sat in the simple chapel of San Damiano, I contemplated the crucifix from which Jesus spoke to Francis — “Rebuild my church.”  I said to God,  If you can speak to Francis, why not me?  I’ve spent these days here listening, and have heard nothing.”  To my surprise He spoke — not aloud — saying, “Feed my sheep.”  This is my call, sometimes to materially “feed” — support — the children at Maama Victoria’s and to offer spiritual bread.

Now, we know that our journey — started three months ago — has truly just begun.  We want to continue serving what has begun.  Ideas are coming and people are offering to assist.  We will keep you informed as we go along.  We invite you to continue being with us and join in where you feel moved to contribute.

Much Love,

Elizabeth & Steve

Tubasange

This picture was taken as we drove south from Uganda to Rwanda.  We were so impressed with every inch of the land taken to farm on the slopes of the “thousand hills” (Rwanda’s meaning)

We are very comfortably settled into our new home until October 31st.   Passy is our host, who is the niece of Anno from our church.  She is very gracious.  We quickly found common ground in our love of children.  

Tubasange is the name of this place we are staying.  “Tubasange” means “let’s go to meet them where they are.”  It has a wonderful function — a meeting place for children to study/learn, do homework, play and feel at home.  Passy, Jacque and some volunteers have created family here.  

Initially, Passy wasn’t sure if we would be ok with our staying here with kids coming in or if the accommodations were suitable.  We are thrilled, because we now have a purpose beyond being tourists — affirming children and supporting their leaders.  

With so many families damaged from the genocide 20 years ago — missing parents — grandparents — this place fills a huge need.  We came here to understand more about the genocide, but even more, about the amazing rejuvenation going on now.

Reading about reconciliation work like Bishop John Rucyahana and knowing of the work of Central African Vision 2000 is inspiring.  It is unfathomable how some people can forgive such huge injustices.  God’s love is the most powerful agent of change in the universe.

To see this beautiful thriving city, so clean, safe and modern, is an unbelievable contrast to pictures and movies of Kigali in 1994.  The government of Paul Kagame has paired international aid with progressive planning to create order and beauty.  Kampala, Uganda (where we stayed before coming here) is chaos and not always safe, while Kigali is peaceful and organized.

So, with the context of a government effectively creating a unifying and cooperative national identity, paired with a revival of change based on forgiveness, here we are.  These large scale forces have fostered space for Tubasange. 

Yesterday we went to the Kigali Genocide Museum.  I have read many books about this genocide, seen movies, but nothing compared to hearing the story on the site of mass graves (250,000) and seeing dozens of shattered skulls.  Later we went out to hear some traditional music with Maria Yohana, the aunt of Jacque, the director of Tubagange.  On the way, we were told she is a singer and leader of many in Rwanda.  We were taken to the Mille Collines, the hotel the rest of the world remembers as the ravaged “Hotel Rwanda.”  This place was sparkling new and lively, but still recognizable from the movie.  

Several people greeted Maria as we entered, and as we watched the music, various band members came and asked Maria to sing with them.  She finally gave in and stepped up to the microphone.  In a powerful voice, she sang “Itsenzi,” Victory.  The crowd all knew it.  It is a song of hope — “I can see the end of our troubles, I can see children happy, I can see victory.”

What a transition on this day, from death and hatred to resurrection and joy.  Hallelujah!

 Yes, Hallelujah!  

Coming to Rwanda now has been filled with synchronicity as you can see from what Steve shared.  Having a first hand experience of the awesome work these people in Rwanda have done, after losing a million people and having the entire country devastated.  Steve has shared what we have already experienced here.  I am amazed at the experience here already.

One of the things that has impressed me the most is how the government  has taken care of the children.  The first lady, Jeanette Kagame, said, “Treat any child as your own.”  So, the families responded with taking in the children who lost their parents and grand parents in the genocide.  There are no orphanages here.  Passy attested how well the children have responded to this in their expressing how much they love having more bothers and sisters.  When Steve and I met with the children today here at Tubasange, we could see the confidence and care they are receiving here with Passy and Jacques and in their new homes.

After being at the Genocide Memorial Museum, walking by the mass grave site and seeing the many pictures of those buried there and those still missing, some of the clothes of those found, and hearing the many stories from the survivors, and how the UN and USA and many of the largest countries did not help — even seeing it with my own eyes — it was unbelievable.  When we got home, Steve told me about his father sharing a movie with him when he was 12 years old.  It was about the genocide of the Jewish people  in Germany.  His father said, “We have to look at this, even though it is hard, because if we don’t look at it, it will happen again.”  I certainly see now what he means. 

I have shared with Steve many times how grateful I am that he has brought me to Africa.  I have experienced things here each step of the way that has affected me deeply.  My best friend has said, “You will never be the same.”  So true.  

We have quite a week ahead of us.  A visit to Mahama Refugee camp which is four hours south east of here, close to the Burundi border, to take some things from our dear friend, Suavis, to her mother and sisters.  They fled from Burundi a few years back.  Just getting a pass to enter the camp is quite an ordeal.  Thanks to Passy for helping us at MIDIMAR cut through all the red tape.  Just one of the many things she has helped us with.  We will let you know how it goes.  

Sending Love,

Steve & Elizabeth

Being Neighbors

“It is in giving that we receive.”

This line is from the prayer attributed to St. Francis.  A profound and poetic prayer.  This line lingers as we come home. 

We didn’t go on a “Mission” trip to give money and enlightenment to the lost and needy.  We went to Africa to be in relationship with people of a different background.  We went with openness and availability, seeing to be neighbors and to stretch our definition of the word “Neighbor.”  

It has been an amazing time of giving and receiving, often so intertwined as to confound any labelling of who is the giver and who is the receiver.

Our first “neighbors” were Chuck and Beth Bradshaw, who invited us to stay in their home in Uganda for a week.  A week turned into four weeks as they shared their home, their knowledge of culture and pragmatics, their food.  We received.  We helped them pack for their departure after a three year mission there.  We witnessed the results of their work and provided validation and perspective, and hosted them for a brief respite before their final week.  We gave. 

We met Henry Ssebagala, who was quick to run errands, assist in a bit of woodworking I was doing.  Unlike many, Henry asked for nothing in return.  He did open his heart in a very natural way and share parts of his life.  We received.  After many days we helped to pay for some needed dental work.  We gave.

Henry just sent us this picture ... he is getting used to a new smile ...

Next, we moved to a boarding school which houses about 70 orphans.  We were treated like a king and queen with all of our needs attended to.  When Elizabeth was ill, the children ministered to her every need when she was awake, and quietly checked in on her when she was asleep.  We received.  When we became aware that may had no shoes, than some had been abandoned by parents unable to support them, we gave.

Next, we travelled by bus to Rwanda.  A friend from Portland had arranged for her niece to meet us at the bus station.  And, in our correspondence with her we shifted our plan from staying in a hotel to staying in a B & B she was starting.  Passy and her friend Jacques were to become our closest neighbors on our trip.

Jacques and Passy accompanied us everywhere we wanted to go, driving us to see local music, introducing us to many members of their community.  Whenever we expressed curiosity about something, they made sure we were able to experience it.  Ugali, an African delicacy, is a starchy hand food used to dip into other types of food.  We asked, they provided.  We received over and over.  They are a part of a community that lost their parents in the Genocide twenty two years ago.  They were in need of encouragement and validation by elders.  We gave.  And will continue these relationships.

Our most concrete goal of this trip was to help the mother of a friend of ours from Portland.  Her mother, two sisters and two nephews, had to flee Burundi for their life.  They were in a refugee camp in Rwanda, 250 km from where we were staying, and her mother had several serious health concerns and hoped to help her secure a medical visa to receive treatment in the U.S.  After two days of meetings at the U.S. Embassy in Kigali, it was clear that this was not going to happen.  We failed.

We still went to visit them in the refugee camp.  In delivering the news that a medical visa was not possible, the loss of hope for her was overwhelming.  Nevertheless we sat together, in a 8X8 ft home and we prayed together.  The bearer of bad news prays for hope.  For two hours we were neighbors, and this remains true.

We have learned that being neighbors is giving and receiving freely.  Often it is unclear whether we are giving or receiving — just that we are open and present — the spirit moves where it will.  We have learned that being neighbors doesn’t end when we return home.  Otherwise it is just a game.  Once a neighbor relationship is formed, there is a responsibility to the neighbor both ways.

So, we are here in our home in Maine filled to overflowing with the blessings received from our trip to Africa after having a quiet time in Assisi, Italy.  We will have more to share with you as we continue to give and receive with our new neighbors.  This communication through this blog has felt to be a deep connection with you, our dear friends, we have felt you with us each step of the way.  

To be continued …

Much Love,

Steve & Elizabeth

Thank You!

We are leaving Africa on Tuesday and moving onto Italy.  There are so many close friendships we have made while here in Uganda and Rwanda, it is very difficult to leave.  So, we will attempt to share our gratitude and blessings here …

Thank you Chuck and Beth Bradshaw for making room in your home for us and blessed us with your devotions each morning and presence of love and guidance each day, as we first landed in Uganda.

Thank you Henry for letting us into your heart and life.  You call us Maama and Papa — we are so honored and blessed.

Thank you Maama Victoria and Stephen for bringing us close to so many lovely children of all ages in your school/orphanage.  We are looking forward to working with you in supporting these children and returning to share this blessing with others.

Thank you Peter for keeping us safe as you drove us on our Safari in Murchison Falls; to Kampala and Entebbe.  We know you will be with us in future visits to continue to keep our travels comfortable.

Thank you Passy for caring for us in Kigali, Rwanda in your new B&B.  It was so difficult to leave you.  We have taken you under our wings and hold you close in our Hearts, no matter where you are or we are.  You go with us to America as we keep in touch.

Thank you Jacques for your quiet assuring presence as we opened to the details of the Genocide and walked through the Memorial together as well as we returned from the refugee camp.  We thank you for your safe driving taking us to all parts of Kigali.

Thank you Boniface for giving us a way to visit the Mahama Camp and for your hospitality.  Thank you Veronique for sharing your home in the camp with us.  And, thank you for the guidance of Claudine.

Thank you, all of those we have met along the way and God Bless!

A journey of a lifetime is coming to a close as we leave Africa on Monday.  We are so glad to have some time in Italy, with Saint Francis, to integrate all of what has been received during this life changing experience.

Our schedule in Italy — we arrive early morning in Rome on Wednesday, November 2nd.  We will take a train from the airport to Assisi.  There we will stay at a monastery for three days to be in the presence of Saint Francis and Saint Clare.  Then, to LaVerna — a few hours north of Assisi.  We stay in a monastery in LaVerna for a three days — next to the caves where Saint Francis meditated and where he received the stigmata.  Then, back to Rome to stay close to the Vatican for a few days.  A glorious time for infused meditation and prayer, in His Graceful Presence.

Here is an excellent description of these two saints from Richard Rohr a Franciscan Monk …

Francis and Clare of Assisi are two prime examples of people who chose to live on the "edge of the inside" — who understood life as participation — knowing things from the outside-in and from the bottom-up offers a more authentic view of reality. But that's not the only reason why Francis and Clare were able to see things differently than most of us do. Was it because they were more moral, more "chosen, " more detached, more loving, more sincere? These are all likely true, yet I believe the very foundation of what we mean by holiness or mysticism is knowing and loving from our Source. Francis and Clare knew by participation in a “Larger Knowing” that many of us call God.  

We don’t know whether we will have access to wifi to continue our communication with you while in Italy.  So, you may not hear from us until we return home on November 10th.  

This has been quite a journey for us.  We are so blessed to have you join us each step of the way.  Thank You!

Love,

Steve & Elizabeth

Visiting a Refugee Camp

“My God, my God, why have you forsaken them?”

(Psalm 22)

Steve and Passy (our host) visited the Mahama Refugee Camp which is four hours east of Kigali, Rwanda on the border of Tanzania.  We had supplies to deliver from Suavis, who is our dear friend from our church family in Portland, Maine.  Her mother, two sisters and two nephews have fled Burundi and have lived in this camp for over a year now. 

(Steve) Mahama Refugee Camp is “home” to 70,000 people — a city slightly smaller than Portland, ME.  In a corner of this lush, green, fertile country, it is barren, dry, dusty.  Yesterday we sat with a family of our good friends from home.  The floor was covered by their sleeping mats bearing the logo of UNHCR - the UN agency which runs the dozens of camps for the millions of refugees who have fled their homes to save their lives.

Yesterday we were with five people — Veronique, the grandmother; Claudine and Regina, two daughters; and Billy 18 and Badou 14.  The building was made up of two 8ft/8ft rooms made of mud bricks and covered by corrugated steel.  Veronique apologized for not having tea and snacks to offer us.  After having left behind a good life in Burundi, she was humiliated to have guests and not be able to offer the hospitality that is universal on this continent.

We learned that one pound of maize flour must last each person five days.  We learned that the wait to see a doctor can be one year.  Veronique broke the bones in her lower leg several moths ago.  This healed in a way that her leg is unstable and she must walk with a stick.  Previously, we had learned at the U.S. Embassy, that even if she were granted a visa to get to our country to be with her daughter, she would be turned back at the border.  She spoke of how little hope they had and despair was palpable.

There is nothing to do here in Mahama — no work, nothing to read — no way to work toward a future.  UNHCR is replacing the tents with the mud brick homes and paving the water ditches with stones.  They are preparing for people to be here many years.  

Then, we were taken by Claudine to visit the oldest accommodations there — large buildings partitioned into maybe 50 living stalls.  We were welcomed into one of these, holding about 8 people.  I held a 3 month old baby boy named Adonai.  They had heard that I had prayed with Veronique’s family and asked me to pray with them.  In the next stall was a man near the end of his life with heart problems.  I was overwhelmed and numb.

Last night I could not pray.  It seemed as if God has forgotten these people — abandoned them.  How could I pray to a God who seemed to have abandoned some of his children.  Elizabeth held me as I told her of my inability to pray.  She said our evening prayer for both of us.  I said, “I know I will be able to pray tomorrow, but first I must live through this dark night.”

(Elizabeth)  I was unable to go to the camp with Steve and Passy.  I was very weak from a bad cold.  When they came home in the late evening, I could see they were both affected deeply by their experience at the camp.  I shared with Steve that their loving presence has brought a light into the camp and let us focus on this Light of Love.  All I could do was to be in this Light myself and hold to God’s Loving Presence.  I was reminded of this quote:

“Keep the eye of your mind ever toward the Lord.”

Psalm 25:15

Jacques and Passy want to go to the camp on a monthly basis to give Shiatsu (a healing massage) and bring to them whatever they can get to bring.  Jacque said, “Many people complain about what they don’t have in their lives, until they see how other unfortunate people live, then they have appreciation for what they have.  It is good to see this and to help however you can.”  

These two amazing people are living their calling, “Tubasange” — “let us meet them where they are.”

After having five years without a job and always trying other options and failed, I thought I am the most suffered person.  But, yesterday I saw many my age staying in camp and I apologized to God for my complaining.  I wish them to be in a home like me — to sleep in a bed like me.  I am so speechless.

I have lived in a refugee camp too for three months when I was eleven years — it was so hard .  Even if during genocide, we didn’t have any help from outside, in the camp we had biscuits and enough food.  Now, I can see how the world is changing.

I and my friend Jacques, we were thinking to go back there and see what we can do with the people in the camp — we do Shiatsu massage which can help with specific body problems, but can also let them feel our presence in this difficult life.

This is the meaning of our center — to go and meet the people who are in need of love, family — being together with others and share what we possess.  It may be food, materials, skills, but mostly being there together for each other.  This is a voluntary job anyone can join us and share in any way he/she can.

I thank God for being with the people I am with today, who understand this, and who have been able to learn from the past.

Today I may need you for help but tomorrow you may need the same.  Let’s be there for one another.

Another area where we can bring our prayers and the Light of God’s Love.  

It is going to be so hard to leave here on Monday.  Passy and Jacques have opened their Hearts to us as we have to them.  In such a short time we have become close like family.  God bless them and all who benefit from their loving presence.

Love,

Steve & Elizabeth

Moving On ...

We wrote this message from Kampala, Uganda last Monday, after we left Maama Victoria’s school/orphanage.  We didn’t have internet access to send it then and so we send it to you now that we do have WiFi …

We left the orphanage/school Monday morning.  Sunday night the children had a farewell for us just before dinner.  We met in the usual place outside where the evening singing and prayers were held.  All of the children were there — some were sitting on their benches — others were up front ready to sing for us.  Maama Victoria’s family was there too.  Steve and I were so touched by all of the love that was showered on us.  

We had a surprise for the children too — a large drum for them to use for their evening praise music.  The boys were using pails turned upside down for drumming.  We were amazed at what music they could get out of the pails, but decided a real drum was needed.  They loved it!  When they played it Steve and I danced with the children.  They loved that too.

It was so difficult to say goodbye.  One of Maama’s son’s started to sing the song from Sound of Music — “So long, farewell … good bye … good bye …”  Perfect.  We left the children in tears.

We will carry each one of these children home with us in our Hearts and find ways to support them from our home in America.  

We’ve been gone less than 24 hours and already there is a powerful calling taking shape to return with a group.  We feel like we’ve been called to bring a group of people into this beautiful vision of how these children’s lives can be improved.  We are inspired by Maama Victoria and want to share this inspiration.

This is an ideal place to bring a group because of the comfortable guest house set up for westerners and because of the pervasiveness of English as their second language.  

It is our vision to support the efforts toward a self-sustaining operation, which is already under way.  Fostering children’s education to maximize their potential is less an act of charity but more a wise use of resources.  But, most of all, we keep seeing these children’s faces, their eagerness to learn, their willingness to work, and their joy in singing praises.

In ten days we entered so fully into the rhythms of life there, that after leaving Monday morning, it is hard to know how to be here — where we are now.  So, our energy is already beginning to focus on our returning with a group sometime in the next year.

We are now in Kigali, Rwanda in our endeavor to assist Veronique, Suavis’s mother, who is in a refugee camp and needs to have a medical visa to America, to be cared for by her daughter.  We will go to the US Embassy and just take it step-by-step.  More on this as we move forward.

Much Love,

Elizabeth & Steve

P.S. The pictures in this message were taken by Carol, one of the students in the graduating class.  She wanted me to show her how to work the camera.  And, then her first time using a camera, she proceeded to take these awesome pictures.  She is a natural.  We are going to make cards with her pictures and give all the proceeds to help her pay for tuition for secondary school.  Here is Carol with one of the children …

Too Hard To Swallow

The last communication we sent to you was from Steve.  I wasn’t ready to put down my feelings and thoughts after diving deeply into the life these children have here.  Yes, they have food, a place to live, an education and lots of love … but …

Today I went on a tour of the facilities and where the children sleep and watched them receive their breakfast from the “kitchen.”  I saw rows of bunkbeds three high crammed in a small room where two sleep in each bed.  I knew the condition of the mattresses from seeing them out in the sun.  I saw some small tin trunks sitting in the corner on top of each other and asked if each child had a trunk.  No, I was told, several share one trunk.  So, that is why I saw things hanging from the rafters, literally.

The kitchen was an outside shed and they were cooking a large pot of porridge made with water and maize (very similar to ground up corn).  The children stood in line with the smallest in front and had their cup filled.  We had bought them some biscuits from the store and they were given one of those as well.  It was just too much for me to watch.  I left and went back to my room to take it all in.

Have you ever heard of the expression, “This was too hard to swallow.”  Well, I had never experienced this expression until now.  I actually was eating breakfast after this and found it very difficult to swallow — too much going down at once.  It was dynamically experienced.

One of the sessions we had with the children here we spoke about, “Everyone is doing the best they can.”  It is hard to agree with that when I see how things are happening here — but it is true — they are doing the best with what they have. 

When I was a little girl and I didn’t eat all of my supper, my dad would say, “Think about all the hungry children in Africa.”  I certainly didn’t know what he was talking about and I bet he didn’t either.  We don’t see until we actually go there and see for ourselves the need that is happening here and in other countries such as this.  And, we certainly don’t hear about in the evening news.

I am so grateful to be here and to see for myself how my neighbor lives and be open to do what I can with what I have.  And, to be open to share with you, my dear friend, and with anyone else who will listen.

We have a routine of joining the children when they sing and dance praises to the Lord just before bedtime.  After their evening prayer they sing this …

All night, all day, angels watching over me, my Lord.

All night, all day, angels watching over me.

They are in good hands.

Faithfully,

Elizabeth